The silence is so deafening ,GBV

                    As we prepare to head into 16 days of activism against Gender based Violence,  Im forced to do some introspection .

                    Last week our local newspapers were littered with the latest headlines ,the big story as another woman was brutally murdered by her former husband ,after enjoying less than one year of wedded bliss .He choose to end her life as well as his own ,refusing to live to face the consequences of his actions .

                     Our domestic violence numbers are increasing so rapidly and within a season of increased violence that this latest act of horror  seemed to only evoke anger  in her immediate circle and a few voices were raised in shock and alarm ,but as a nation , there seemed to be a a deafening silence .

                        Where were the womens groups, wheres the outcry from the church , where is the outrage from women seated in parliment? But then what is to be said, this was a woman who was a trained law professional , a teacher , an outstanding member of the community ,one would think she would have access to provisions made for women facing domestic violence situation and was in a great position to secure her personal protection, but no her seperation from the individual to a place within his reach proved fatal .

                      Most times in the aftermath you hear of the horror unleashed by  the perpetrator on the victim which would have expanded over time  ,making there  life a living hell.  You would hear about how toxic the perperator was , by a lifestyle of loss and debt and toxic traits . 

                       One is left to wonder why more isnt done by the victims to protect themselves, is it a cultural thing ,because in my country for the most part we are a people that easily forgive and forget ,especially us women .We will show love , be the frist to assist those that only recently hurt us ,and we always think that what has happened to the nieghbour ,wont happen to us , because we know this person well   

                       You will hear them say , he  Is not  the violent type , he may get angry ,but he will never murder someone , he may never murder me, so they dont leave the country , they dont disappear , they sometimes stay  within the same community ,

                         I   wonder sometimes if they understand that their are persons out there fighting for them , fighting to change laws to put things in place ,to keep them safe . I wonder if they know or appreciate that we all feel the pain when a life is violently snuffed out and we all wish for it to stop.

                          According to  an article in a   local newspaper of November 17th ,2022, I quote" despite headlines describing abuse and murder of women, unfortunately, most victims do not report instances of domestic violence to the relevant authorities including the police." end quote 

                            The report further states , "Speaking at today’s Joint Select Committee’s second public inquiry into the State’s capacity to provide support for victims of domestic violence and family conflicts, President of the Coalition Against Domestic Violence (CADV) Roberta Clarke noted that she was unable to give an exact figure on whether or not reports of violence increased over the last two years as “a lot of those go unreported.”

                             And there in lies the problem maybe as I said before culturally there is a misconception of what really is defined as domestic violence ,are we such  a normally violent society that we consider certain acts of violence to be the norm , just a way of life , we believe that conflicts are all part of life and excess force is one option to resolution 

                               In spite of there being truth in many of the cases going unreported , I think the more serious ones do reach the authorities and the courts ,there some be some form of reporting for the matter to end up in court anyway . 

                                What  I think should be of more concern is the non chalant attitude with which that imformation is handled by those in authority and those advocating for an end to domestic violence .In my humbled opinion more needs to be done to protect our women , once they are identifed to be at risk of being the next statistic, nothing should be left to chance 

                                    Its really a sad state of affairs , when this is where we have reached as a nation , as this paragraph from the same newspaper story above ,spell it out   and I quote" domestic violence is the number one crime committed in T&T, Clarke said political will is needed to address the situation as action taken by the State against such cases must meet the demands for the service." end of quote 

                                    At the end of the day ,it takes all of us to make a difference in this fight , I pray the deafening silence isnt a sign of defeat , or acceptance that the battle seemed lost , but rather a regrouping. I pray my initative SETUP becomes a reality to fill some of the serious gaps in the system , a safe haven , a place of serenity