The Cost of a Natural Process

I was 13 when I saw blood in my pants. I still remember how surreal it felt. My period had come. Finally, as they say I had become a woman. Like most girls of that age I freaked out. Before the Head Mistress of my school would gather all the girls in senior primary classes to give us The Talk. My problem was that it was not a warm and happy talk. This talk was designed to inspire fear. We were told that as soon as our periods started we would get pregnant if we even so much as laid down with a boy, we were told that when we bled we released rotten blood that would automatically make us smell and, lastly, we were told that if we ever got stained in public and people saw we were automatically noted as dirty and lazy girls. With all these swirling in mind the thought of my period coming was more of a nightmare than a dream come true. But eventually, the inevitable happened and mine came as well. Luckily, when I went to my mother, she did not put even more fear into me but shed light on what was happening to me. She explained the complex process that my body was going through, she explained how my body was getting ready to carry a baby some day in the future. At that point I did not understand everything and just saw my period as an inconvenience I wish I did not have to go through. But I grew to understand what was going on with my body. It did not come to me immediately but gradually. Which is why when in boarding school a junior student who had just come to me when she first saw her period, I immediately became the big sister she did not have there. I showed her how to use her pad, talked to her about how and when to remove it. I stayed with her until I saw she understood and calmed down. I also helped her reach her mother who was grateful to me.

The topic of menstruation continues to be a topic. Sadly, to this very day, there is a lot of misinformation that flies around regarding a completely normal body function. One of the very worst one I heard growing up was that the only way to stop period cramps was getting pregnant. This information was passed by an adult. A lot of young girls do not have good role models who demystify the whole process and make it normal. In Nigeria, a lot of adults suddenly tell you that you have become a woman and suddenly expect to act like a 'woman'. This comes with a level of pressure that cannot be easily explained. We are suddenly told to be more mature, learn to take care of the house and others as we have become women who would soon have a home of our own to take care of. The boys, on the other hand, are excluded from this reality. They, most times, are not even told what a period is which is why a lot of times when they come across a girl whose cloth got stained their immediate response is mostly disgust and mockery. This most times follows them into adulthood which is why we see this behaviour among even older men who should know better. This has continued to persist till today. A lot of girls are still not properly educated on the right way or equipped to deal with their periods. Due to the very conservative culture in Nigeria sex education is still very far from adequate in a lot of schools. A sad reality for a lot of young girls.

Another aspect to menstruation in Nigeria I want to shed light on is the cost of menstrual products. A lot of families cannot afford to buy these products monthly. Some mothers go as far as telling their daughters to 'manage' the pads so that they do finish. What does this lead to? The girls leave one pad on most of the day no matter how uncomfortable they feel. Some do not go to school to avoid getting stained. Some do use tissue paper, newspapers, foam, and even leaves in some rural locations. Most institutions also do not have amenities for girls on their periods. Amenities like disposal systems, toilets without doors for privacy or water, no pads, no medications or care for those experiencing menstrual pain.

These and many more are the obstacles the Nigerian girl faces every month when she gets her period.

There have been efforts to deal with these issues like campaigns to remove taxes on menstrual products, NGOs distributing free pads. There have been a lot of calls for menstrual education in school curricula for both boys and girls. There have also been a push for reusable pads to make it sustainable for the large population which lives below the poverty line. Despite all these there is still a lot of work to do. While we fight the bigger fight remember the little ones, the confused little girl who lives on your street, your little girl growing up, the random girl in school who asks for help and the poor girl who got stained in public and does not know what to do. Extend your love, extend your care, show her the love of the sisterhood, tell her she should not be ashamed but be proud to be a woman!!!