I Owe Me An Apology

I owe me an apology

For wasted time, fearful freezes

Mountains of unnecessary

Melancholy

I owe me an apology

For powerlessness 

Helplessness, restlessness

A frightened, leaden tongue

Intentionally blinded eyes

And scared visionlessness

I owe me an apology

For discomfort embraced

Not challenged, not refuted

Not discarded

I owe me an apology 

For tolerated unfairness

Unquestioned self-hatred

Unhealthy, obligatory

Systemic self-criticism

For too many years

Spent loathing being me

I owe me an apology