Emptiness inside- ever had that feeling, I believe we all do, waking up to feeling completely devoid of emotions and of feelings, asked, you may not even explain it yourself. Pause abit, could it be because of fear and anxiety:-
Fear that I am not growing any younger but looking at my life I have not achieved much-the future looks bleak and I am not making any advancement in life; that the job I have today I may not have tomorrow and I probably wouldnt know where to begin, there is no side business in place, no land to till and am still renting- how would I keep it all together, how, that the family that I am struggling to hold together now may see me as failure and a disappointment.
Fear that I may never get out of this bed that am held to because of a sickness I may never recover from fully, the fear that the friends who today hold me in regard will laugh at me when they discover I am not whom they assumed me to be, fear of projects started never being accomplished- the fear of the loves of our lives walking away from us, or the fear of failing to get rid of that addiction to sex, alcohol, laziness and blame game, because I can not admit that the mistake is mine, and I get all panicky and anxious because time I feel is not on my side.
You are not alone, neither am I alone, many of us do experience and are experiencing the same, only we choose to take each day one step at a time, and tackle each life challenge differently. With clear resolution, and a determined heart you can just make up your mind to stop and tell yourself I can do it and you will do- you will stop the alcohol, silence the sexual urges, highlight your project goals and act upon them, resolve to make your relationship work and give your 100% to it and suppress the voice of failure, break up or divorce, you will give your best at your work and you will choose your friends wisely- those that will encourage you.
Even if you are sick and bedridden- who says that is the end,take it as a test and look around you, tell yourself I am fine and you will be fine with Faith in the Almighty, put your ideas to use through those around you, you can still achieve your life goals through your loved ones, who knows tomorrow you will smile with surprise at miles you have achieved. Just don’t let fear pull you down. If another person can do it, who says you and I can’t- of course I can and you can. Decide and implement. Don’t pity yourself coz personally I won’t pity you, and don’t blame the current state of economy, you can still turn your life around.
