Do you want to dad?

Do you want a dad?

I am only 9 years of age turning 10 in december. Today 15 may 2021 was the craziest day of my life. My dad asked me: do you want a dad? duh, I already have a dad...but wait a minute, can I even decide to have a dad? Yes I shouted, I want a dad. It was his second question that surprised me even more: what kind of dad do you want and what do you want from your dad? hmmm, I never thought of that, I only knew what I do not want from my dad. Do not be so strict and force me to do things. My big sister inspired me and gave me some good ideas. When it was my turn to speak, I had my list ready: let me think. One thing I can say about my current dad, when he listens to you he really listens and nobody must interfere, not even my mom.

My list:

The husband of my mother,

• 100 euro per week,


• do not be too strict,


• do things with me alone,


• spend time with me alone


• 2 times per month to the mcdonalds


• PS 4 (new electronics), dad to play with me


• do not threaten me that you will stop me from going on my Ipad


• care for me


• cook better food, food that I like,


• support my mom,


• good father,


• you do not have to be perfect,

That was my list and it felt good. I can not wait to get my first 100 euro. I do not mind buying my own PS4, you know what I mean. I also listened carefully to my siblings list combined:

• a dad that protects,


• caring dad


• gives me money and his heart,


• not too fat,


• new iphone,


• one who has time for me and not always on his phone,


• ask and give me personal attention


• exclusive time for me,


• interested in my life and the things I like,


• goes shopping with me,


• not forgetting to give me my pocket money,


• I need my own bankcard,


• more money.

Their list also sounds very good. So what are we waiting for?

Let me introduce myself to you and tell you more about my current dad!!!

I was born in 2011 in Amsterdam. We just relocated from a town next to Amsterdam, called Diemen. Laag Kouwenoord was a new building project. So everyone was new in the area. My current dad was quite active, he is a community developer. I don’t really know what that means or what he does. I only know that he was always busy and in meetings. The nice thing about it was, we knew a lot of children in the area within a very short space of time. My dad used to organize community cleaning days in the area. But enough about my current dad, you will meet him later.

I attended school in Diemen, I do not remember liking school. As a matter of fact I still do not like school. one day, during a meal, we had a discussion and the question was: would I like to live in another country for some time? This was too much of a big question to me, but I remember hearing: we do not have to go to school. My mother would teach us from home and dad would not be so busy anymore...that sounded great except dad never became less busy. I said yes, not knowing that the latter would be true. I relocated to South Africa in 2016, where my dad was born. I really enjoy flying. Do you know why? Remember my wishlist in the beginning you could probably guess. In most of the long distance aircrafts (Boeing 777), you have your own TV screen where you can watch unlimited movies and play any game you like.

We never had a Television, just to let you know. So I do not know where my love for electronics comes from. Might be the fact that we never had a TV, who knows. I had a playdate with my friend from school at our house. Out of nowhere he said: your family is poor. I remembered my dad saying that we are rich so it did not bother me too much but I had to say something. I do not like what you are saying and why do you even say we are poor, I asked him. He said you do not have a television. Now that even made me more upset. I told my sisters and my friend that we could not play at our house for some time. But we have a trampoline, so the distance did not last very long. He is also the only one interested in digital games; fortnight and minecraft, so I thought it would not benefit me very much not to play with him anymore. Just to let you know, we are cool now with each other.

We lived 4 years in South Africa. There is a lot I can say about our time over there. Dad did a lot of good work in the community where he grew up. But he was always busy. We lived on a small residential farm of 10 hectares. This was the best time of my life. Our house where we lived was not the best. We all slept in one room with my parents. I really liked this time of my life. This might be also the reason why my big sister and I still sleep in the same room even though we all have our own room. So we decided to use the extra room for a chilling room, where we can play. We had one big pony, named “Schoonheid”/beauty, five donkeys: Africa, Blanch, Coco, and the two baby donkeys which we gave away. We also had 13 mix goats, boerbok and white saanen goats (milk goats). There were about 50 chickens and lots of rats. Do not forget all the rabbits. The idea was to live self-sustainably, and we did. The animals were taken very good care of and some ended up in our pot. I never liked that, this must be why I do not eat much meat. I even became vegetarian for some time. My best friend was vegan, so it was not very difficult not to eat meat.

My best animal on the farm was my dog. It is a very sad story but it is worth telling you about it here. In fact we had a lot of dogs, we first had a puppy called gesiggie (small face). Gesiggie was white, not well mannered but we all loved gesiggie. We unfortunately found gesiggie dead one morning. Then we got Lassy, which was more my sister's dog. Lassy would disappear every now and then, one day he never returned. My dog, fluffy. That was my dog...really my best friend. I picked up from the conversations between my mom and dad that our neighbor killed my dog. I hate him for that, I am not supposed to say that from my dad, but I really do not like our neighbor for killing my best friend. He claims that fluffies babies, prince and scarlet killed one of his sheep.

Prince and Scarlet are the only dogs I still feel attached to in South Africa. We have a 9 months white Swiss shepherd now. I love him and play with him. It is not the same. My dad does not like the dog, especially when my mom had to go to the hospital because the dog ran after another dog and made her fall and almost broke her arm. My dad is overprotective and he even agrees when you tell him that. I can understand that because you must walk your dog every day at least 2 times per day if you do not want the dog to po in the house. Mom wakes up early to walk the dog. My dad does the last round before going to bed.

By Now you must be wondering what happened to my dad's wishlist, I managed to get 2 euro per week instead of 100 euro. With my dad’s debating and negotiating skills he convinced me that 2 euro is better for me. I also tried 3 euro, but then I would earn more than my bigger sister. If that happens, that will not be such a good idea. My dad always said that we are rich so I do not really understand the problem. So my PS4 will wait for a loooooong time. We did agree that I am getting a savings bank account. .

Going two times per month to the mcdonald's will never happen, having a mom who is an expert at her work on health. I might have to get used to veggies for some time. You can understand that I cannot promise anything for the future, when I am big.

So who is my current dad? He is funny, but those are really dad jokes. He would for example say, let's go to the movies or let's make a stop at the macdonalds and we will not. It is more like a lie than a joke if you ask me.

I think my current dad does not know anything about being a dad. This is not me dissing my dad but I just feel like that sometimes. My current dad lost his father when he was very young, and his mom died when he was 9 years of age turning 10. Is this the reason? I do not know. He hardly speaks about it. He never speaks about it, that is why I just think that is the way it is. We had a very awkward moment a few weeks ago. Dad cried at the table when one of his mentors died. Whatever that means. My sister said that it was someone special to dad who took care of him when he was a teenager. Dad also said that he had many fathers in the form of his so-called mentors. Joe Slingers was a special man to dad. Freddie Michaels is another special man in my dad's life. He calls him Boeta and he was introduced to me as “oupa/grandfather”. It was my dad's boeta who took him as his own son. I might tell you a bit later in my story about boeta. This is a very important man in our family, on my dad's side.

Katie Nelson Michaels Maarman was my dad's mom. He tried explaining to me why she has three surnames. I still do not understand but I know that his real dad is mr. Nelson and his mother married later to Henry Maarman. So he became Randall Maarman.

My mother keeps on asking me why I keep on saying “current dad” as if I want another dad. But is this not the purpose of my story to discover which dad I want. No bad on my current dad because he was the one who started with the question if I want a dad. I did say YES, So why not.

So why am I so interested in this topic? I told my dad that I like soccer. Wrong thing ever said. I am now obligated to go to soccer three times per week, even on a saturday. I hate going to soccer on a saturday. Can’t I just go two times per week or do a different sport? It's good for you and you’ll have a new friend soon in our new neighborhood, my dad would say. I do not want a new friend and I also play soccer at school. I play soccer almost every day at school. I don't really need friends, I am okay if I have my ipad. Can I do something so I can go on my Ipad? Please dad, what can I do to go on my Ipad. This always works if I want something from my dad. Just tell him...what do I need to do to get it….or dad I need you. He likes that, so I use that. Time for minecraft. time for loading the game does not count because sometimes it takes a looooong time to load minecraft. My sister convinced me a few days ago to download Tiktok, it literally took all my ipad time and I did not even want tiktok. So I always add 3 minutes extra when my dad asks me to set my timer. you just never know. When I am lucky, I have 3 minutes extra

I have to admit that my dad did try his best. Well after my mom told him to spend time with me. He told me to get my soccer ball because he wants to play with me. What happened to asking? He probably knew I would choose my ipad. I did tell him. Do not worry dad, even if you are a noob “beginner” in minecraft you can always watch me play but playing with me is even better. It is too difficult for me, he replies. Really what is so difficult about playing minecraft. I bet he doesn't even know how to spell minecraft.

Before you think that I only live with my current dad. I stay with my mom, current dad and two sisters. My older sister is of the opinion that this story must be about her. I have to admit she would be better at telling this story; she is smart, beautiful and always joyful. The only thing I dislike about her is that she wants me to do tiktok. She can spend hours on her phone making a tiktok. I think that she will be very famous because she always talks about becoming a famous blogger. I played in a few of her tiktoks, that is why I know she is very creative.

You will not guess what happened a few days ago after my dad’s first question. Do you want a dad? I said yes but I am still thinking about which one I want. It was almost like he saw the light: I asked him to tell him more about minecraft. Yes, I said. must I be sus about it? Is it a trick or does he really want it? That will be the baddest dad joke ever because I would tell him everything I know about minecraft. who knows, if he would get it he might even play with me sometime. My friend Rody is the only one who can speedrun with me in minecraft.

I would do any chore for 30 minutes of Ipad time.

Can we make a rule: you can do chores for Ipad time.

The reason behind my dad’s question. He said that he wants to be the dad I want. So, do not lose hope. We have a long way to go.

Just to let you know my name is Luc, I do not like my real name Lucas